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 I am married and I have a girl friend and I am very happy, why would I give this up?
Yeah yeah, I know you guys are gonna talk about how much pain I am causing and how much of a pig I am blah blah blah.
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 Married or Long-Term Partnered: How long would you go without intimatcy in your relationship before....?
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I am in a situation and would like your honest opinion. I am currently engaged for about 5 months now to a man i've been with for a little over a year. He is military, so we are on a long ...


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 How to prevent spouse from learning SSN?
How does one go in a marriage without the other person knowing SSN?

Or at least a way to protect identity in a marriage?
Is this a sign of trust issues?...



jacqueline
What to do when your husband puts his daughter's needs before his wife?



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2010-07-26 03:27:45 +0000
Jealous of the daughter are we? Your either a step mom ( and anything your husband does for his daughter is going to make you jealous) or the biological mom (in that case, you need therapy because thats your daughter and you should be grateful your husband is so loving and protective, many men dont even bother with their daughters. What do you do... well depends on what exactly the situation is... you mean like he kisses her before you when he comes home from work? He ignores you and pays attention to her???? Your very general here and explain nothing.

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2010-07-26 03:27:33 +0000
It depends on if you are the child's mother, or the second wife.
In the PRIMARY marriage, the children should NOT become more important than the relationship between the spouses.
In the case of a SECOND marriage, his children SHOULD be his focus... not a new love interest.
Nothing should come between the parent child relationship when the kids are growing up if parent's remarry.
xoxoxoxo

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2010-07-26 03:25:12 +0000
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nothing. my dad does that. he does it because im his only daughter and even if we had another daughter it would be my brother first ( first child) then me and if we had another it would be her. you have to sacrafice some things when you have a kid. there might not be a "my wife is first" you have kids now and that doesnt mean that their more important then you. its just that its probally his only daughter or kid and it means the world to him.

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2010-07-26 03:27:58 +0000
Are we talking incest?

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2010-07-26 03:34:56 +0000
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His daughter is part of him. You are not. Sorry it sounds so harsh but once a person decides to have children, they become first.

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2010-07-26 03:40:54 +0000
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You don't say if his daughter is also your daughter, or if you married him with a child already in tow. This makes a difference.

Marriages are more successful when FIRST-TIME spouses put each other first. BUT, if there has been a divorce with children involved, the children have to come first until they grow up. This is why you often hear advice that divorced parents should not remarry until the children are grown.

You see, kids only grow up once, and they need to have a chance to grow up psychologically sound. They shouldn't have to compete with step-parents for the love of their parent. Their world has already been fractured. The step-parent, hopefully being older and more mature than the child, needs to "suck it up" and hang in there until the children are grown. If they decide they want to insist on coming first, they risk losing their marriage. Instead, they should be supporting their spouse's goals toward parenting.

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2010-07-26 03:32:17 +0000
your daughters needs should be important and be glad dad sees her needs,try to incorporate yourself into them sometimes with the 3 of you sweet mildred is my leader.. crawl into her playpen with me.

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2010-07-26 03:24:31 +0000
Ummm, grow up, stop acting like a baby & remember you picked him

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2010-07-26 03:34:52 +0000
the spouse always comes first, once the child's needs are met, i adore our son so i don't care if my husband always puts him first.
however he is our son, not his son.
sit down clamly with him and her and discuss it
if she's really young; you have to be understanding

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2010-07-26 03:24:48 +0000
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Be happy that you have a good man.

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2010-07-26 03:24:49 +0000
Be thankful and not selfish

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2010-07-26 03:28:54 +0000
Children should come first.

Besides, your question is not specific enough but it sounds like you are jealous of her. If I am picking up on this, I am sure your husband and daughter have it figured out.

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2010-07-26 04:20:18 +0000
I have to agree with most of the others here. It sounds like you are the second wife in this question unless we are reading the question wrong. You must understand if you are the second wife that his kids will come first. They need to know from their mother and father that they are loved and cared for. Divorce and new marriages are hard on the kids. Their world has been turned upside down. They do not know one end from the other. Be supportive and help her father get through the trying time of childhood. It could be better than it is if you try.

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2010-07-26 03:29:14 +0000
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Congratulate him. He is a good father. As for the wife..no matter if this is her natural child or not, she should be mature enough to know that the needs of children comes before the parent's needs. Perhaps the wife is jealous? Feeling that she is being taken for granted or any number of other short comings in the marriage. None-the-less, children are not pawns to be blames for the ills of a bad marriage. Grow up. Good luck placing blame where it belongs....between you and him.

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2010-07-26 03:35:51 +0000
I disagree with most of the answers. The spouse should always come first. That is not to say that you don't provided what your kids need but in the grand scheme of things the spouse comes first. I once asked my sister how she was able to stay married to the same man for 50 years. She said that "We always put each other first."

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2010-07-26 03:25:27 +0000
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Get over it. the child always comes first. grow up and u would see that

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2010-07-26 03:24:31 +0000
You congratulate and respect him for being a good father.

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