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 My husband dosent hug,kiss or make love with me ??? What is going wrong in our life ???Pease help me?
We have got two kids . One boy aged 4 ang gorl 3....

 my husband and i are in the midst of a divorce. who gets the motorcycle?
the only joint property we have is this motorcyle, nothing else. no house, kids or any other credit. the loan for the motorcycle is in both of our names, however, my name is the sole name. the ...

 Fiance is looking at porn, what do I do?
My fiance is the type that he tells what he thinks and doesn't care what people say. He looks at porn in the internet behind my back and then deletes the history. I downloaded a program that ...

 Why won't my husband stop seeing his so called girlfrend?
I went through my husband phone and saw that he be texting this girl all day everyday, so I called her and told her who he was. After she stop seeing him, i went through his phone again and saw that ...

 I have a huge issue I need help on? Please help me?
My husband cant have children and I didnt know until the other day because we have been trying to have children and we both got tested to see what was wrong. It turns out hes sterile and Im pregnant. ...

 How can this be right? Abortions and vasectomies....?
How can it be that if a married woman want to abort a baby she can without the fathers consent but if a married man wants to have a vasectomy he has to take his wife along for a chat with the doc to ...

 Married couples and sex???
I have been married for almost 11 years, and we have ten year old twins.... I only feel like having sex about 3 or 4 times per week, but my husband wants it every night..... sometimes twice a night!!!...

 How do I get my sex drive back?
Please help...I've been married for 3 years and I have a 17 month old. I feel bad because I've lost my sex drive and I don't want my husband to turn to someone else. Any suggestions?...

 Is it normal for young married men to still talk about hot girls?
I have a friend who does that, and I say it's normal....But alot of other people, mostly women, say that it isn't. I've seen married guys have porn, and people are usually ok with ...

 Married men only.......?
Do you feel guilty after having an affair or a one night stand? IF the answer is yes, what do you do to ease the guilt?...

 What do you think is the main reason brings most relationships to an end?
Is it more physical- that they don't feel attracted to their partner's looks anymore or can't satisfy each other in bed, OR

Is it because their characters are no longer ...

 I have a question how can i get........????????????
I just found out my husband was talking to someone at night like 2 3 in the morning and i need to know how i can find out who he is calling with out his phone because he wont let me touch it even ...

 How long can you go without sex?
I'm about max three days, and I start getting unpleasant.

How about you?
Additional Details
SAM: Surgery is no excuse- I waited less than a week after gallbladder removal....

 Is there something wrong with me..about sex?
I think about sex all the time, seriously. I am at work and almost every guy I see.. I imagine him doing naughty things to me. What the hell is going on?
Additional Details
I am married, ...

 How can I convice my husband to take a job?
My husband has been offered a position working in Iraq as a contracted civilian. He would be making really good money yet he is concerned about the area where he will be working and leaving us for a ...

 Should i not speak my mind about how i feel about people who get divorced?
I'm very opinionated (which is usually a good thing LOL but sometimes it isn't) I have very strong opinions about marriage & divorce. I have friends who are happily married & ...

 Do wives of military men cheat a lot when their husbands are away?
I hear they always do because they get lonely....

 Should I get an abortion? (details inside)?
I am almost 5 weeks pregnant and have an appt for an abortion tomorrow. My fiance wants me to keep the baby but I am leaning towars a no and think this will be a bad decision if we keep it. Here'...

 how old is too old for a man to father a child?
i'm 23 and my husband is 39 i want to have a child but later like when i'm 25 that means he will be 41 is that to old or what is considered old?...

 Am i just being insecure??????
Me and my husband have been together for almost 3 years now and we live in an apt. complex. He had a guy friend in the apts. who had a girlfriend and 2 kids. The couple broke up and now he goes up to ...

Alexia D
*10 POINTS!* Why Does My Husband Like Me To Pretend I'm Sleeping When He Has Sex With Me Sometimes?
My husband likes me to pretend I'm sleeping while we have sex sometimes..I go along with pretending I'm sleeping when him and I both know that I'm not, it seems to be such a turn on for him..why does he like to do this? Is it the "forbidden" nature of the act? or does he like having total control of me during this time? Is it a fantasy/fetish? Please help me understand this better.
By the way..we have a great marriage and deeply in love with each other
Additional Details
..and please dont answer by saying he's a pervert because he's not..the act is consentual, only mature answers please!

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Michaele N
EEEEEEWWWWW. It means he's a date drug raper. Watch out for him, And run as fast as you can if he asks you to play dead. Hope for your sake you are wearing condoms.

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I think he has a rape fetish. I suggest play it out more.For his birthday.Or better yet ask him about his fetish. you'll develop your communication skill within you relationship and hopefully grow even closer.

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its as close to raping you as he can get. its totally the forbidden thing i guess. maybe you guys should try roleplay. thats more normal than pretend sleeping.

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Wow, I'm not sure. Maybe, you're right. He likes to be in control. But how in the world can you just lay there and pretend to be asleep when your husband is having sex with you.

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I would think that the whole thing would be more fun if you were participating. I don't really get it.

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its just a fantasy...its a way of changing up the sex for him.....and it turns him on because it is something that is forbidden....but as long as you are comfortable with it, then all is fine and well. But if you ever are uncomfortable with it, then tell him and he will stop right then and there (im only saying that because you two are deeply in love with each other)

good luck

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The older I get, the more I just accept the fact that all of us have our little things that turn us on. There are things that turn me on that are strange but harmless, and I've given up on trying to figure out why. We could psychoanalyze ourselves to death, but in the end, we all just want to be happy and have some fun in the sack every now and then. My advice to you is to go along with it so long as it doesn't hurt your relationship. Then, have him fulfill a fantasy for you as well. You both seem to be in love and get along, just use this to make it stronger, not weaker.

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Maybe he gets excited about taking something he should not or cannot and is not caught. Could be he gets thrilled thinking he is making someone feels so good and the person is not aware it is him and/or is not caught in the act. First time hearing of this and can't be sure why. the fact that you are enjoying it, the fact that he is giving you the pleasurable feeling, the fact the you are "asleep" and not aware of what he is doing, the fact that it may be a "surprise", seems all these get him excited.

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Gee I would take that as he found me extrememly boring or either he has control issues....to each his own tho...if it feels good, then do it ! =)

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Prrrrr ♥
I am sure that he is just trying to act out a sexual fantasy of his, no harm in it if that's what it takes to keep a marriage exciting

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rude and tough
maybe its just one of those things,, like a fetish type-a deal. sounds kinda fun haha

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there's men that are turned on by fantasies of rape, incest, taboo...must be along those lines of sexual fantasy

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The one thing most people on here have not said is: ASK HIM! If it bothers you enough for you to ask us, then you should ask him. In a loving, non-judgemental manner. If you are as in love as you say you are he won't mind answering that question. Also it might bring you closer sexually, and you will be able to share some fantasies with him and it will lead to a better sex life. Communication makes great sex.
If the answer is too weird for you, then at least you will know what you are dealing with. If he is not willing to respect your wishes to stop, then be warned!

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I actually have a friend that does this...it was a little weird when I first heard her tell me this, but after she explained to me why then I kind of understood.

It's almost a domination thing with a fantasy mixed in. Some guys (not all) like the thought of being able to have sex with a sleeping woman without waking her up...like he's on some secret mission to please her without her knowing. While the woman sleeps, the man has total control over his pleasure and in a sense the woman's pleasure. You wake up in the morning thinking you had this amazing dream about hot sex with your man, when in reality you hot sex and didn't know it. Although, I don't know very many women that can sleep through an orgasm, so that's another thing for guys: Waking her up with an amazing orgasm!

Just naughty fantasies...suggest that he actually try getting things heated up while you sleep. Challenge him to an amazing orgasm wake up call. If you are in a great marriage, find ways to make sex even more amazing. Think outside the taboo box and let your imaginations take over. Talk to each other, find out what your secret fantasies are and find a way to make them reality. There is nothing wrong with exploring something as natural as sex when you both love each other.

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That's little scary actually. Maybe he like to pretend you're dead and he just says that he pretends you're sleeping. You might want to look into this because believe it or not there are very disturbed people in this world who like to have sex with dead people. Good luck.

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Mom of 2
Fantasy is important when you have been married for a while. My husband is into it too. It weirded me out at first but he likes for me to call him someone elses name. Hey, what ever does it for him as long as I get mine and it stays between us.

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Mignon M
Its a fantasy... your drunk, or passed out... he is the bad man who is taking advantage... lol
Its normal. My b/f likes me to struggle sometimes! LOL Or scratch him...
We all do these things....

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Its all the above! It is a fantasy of being more dominating and in control in a forbidden situation. lol.

It's by no means perverted. Goodness my husband and I do all kinds of pretending and stuff that some on here would think as terrible but really are just normal role playing and healthy!

I say go with it as long as you are comfortable. I do this for my husband too and sometimes its nice to be able to not have to move! Maybe you should also start some of your own ideas in the sac. Maybe you want to dominate him or something? Whatever it is I encourage you to explore everything you can with your husband that is consensual and pleasurable to you both.

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One of the most enticing things about sex is it's forbidden status.

This is what makes being young so fiery and vivid...everything is verboten.

Unfortunately, for all libidos concerned, sex in marriage is not only acceptable, but laudable. We WANT married couples having sex.

And this can take a little fire out of our love-making. This is why people have sex in semi-public places. This is why people enjoy sex forcefully, or in restraints. This is why people role play.

In the case of your husband, he has simply found another little way to bring back some of the taboo in sex.

Now, for time unremembered, men have enjoyed the status as an aggressor. The dark burning passion to bend another to your will and comsume her utterly is a very erotic idea and is generally universal among us men.

Likewise, the tintilating prospect of letting him "have his way", and the anticipation it brings (what will he do next?) has been a constant amongst women's erotica.

Frankly, I think the two of you are simply embracing human nature. If the sex is pleasurable and you both enjoy your roles in the fanstasy, I don't see how this is a concern.

And you shouldn't let others concern you. I think you've found a safe (no plastic bags or clips), clean (no risk of infections), and utterly pleasurable (he does all the work and does not mind) way of expressing yourselves sexually.

My hats off to you for the fulfillment of this marital fantasy.

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Red Letter
Sleepsex is a sexual fetish. I think it's cool that you play along.

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Live Laugh Love <3
Its a safe way to act on a more carnal and not as romantic desire since you are both aware of it, don't be afraid to act on something you would like, its great that you have such a trusting marriage.

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welll... maybe he juz like the thought of havin sex wth sme1 who is aslp

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Maybe he's a pervert and really wants to have sex with a dead body and you pretending your asleep is as close as he can get. Oh boy, sorry about that I think I've been reading way too much Stephen King! It just sounds like a little fantasy for him, don't worry about it and have fun!

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Because it's absolute power over someone. By absolute I mean you're 'persona' is 'helpless' or 'unwitting'. He can do this to you and you're not in any condition to stop it.

An extension of this type of thing would be bondage. You're tied up and helpless. Probably the best way to term this is "willing" rape for bondage while your situation is 'passive/unaware" rape.

Nothing wrong with it at all. However....if he comes home, asks you to strip, lie in a tub of ice water for an hours and then get out, dry off and lay on the bed real still I'd start having some concerns. Especially if the bedroom is lit with candles, draped in black and organ music is playing on the CD player.

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i know it all!
Shoplifting the goods. Dangerous!

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Koozie the chemist
If everything all happy, don't question too much.

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Wim Wam Woozle
He probably enjoys the feeling of control. There is nothing wrong with this if the act is really consensual.

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I believe its more like fantasy, Example when your drunk in college the women falls asleep and you guys are still doing it. Also yes the guy will have total control. Maybe he likes the feeling of total control. Have fun and experience.

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I think you answered you own question, it's a domination fantasy. Go with it. Nothing is wrong in the bedroom unless the other partner doesn't agree. So enjoy and have fun.

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Got A Question
Everyone has their fetishes. Why do some guys love women's feet? That one always perplexes me. But the whole sleeping thing, I think you're probably right. Maybe its the dominance, but I think it may have little bit more to do with the whole forbidden act. Like he's turned on by getting away with something, ya know? Either way, it's normal, all guys have their little things that keep what happens in the bedroom more interesting.

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