what can i say to my mother regarding adoption of my son?

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Courtney ♥	She's upset because sorry but you are throwing your life away. Will you stay in school? Will you stay with your boyfriend in a unhappy relationship in the future just for the baby if things don't work out? Will you be a single mother? How will you support you and your child? Will you end up working minimum wage for the rest of your life? Are you even done HIGH SCHOOL? A baby is for the rest of your life not just now they become teenagers and adults one day soon. All these things and more are going through your Mom's mind, that's why she's upset. I know it's your baby and you don't want to give it away but in a way you really are throwing away a life that you could of had, University and freedom. One day she may come around but for now you'll have to wait. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Kristin	Your mother is being EXTREMELY unreasonable. They shouldn't kick you out. Especially if you are still minor. Because they cant kick you out. They could be put in jail, if anyone found out. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

mapleleaf2	"Special Message for Baby's Grandma http://www.keepyourbaby.com/special_message_for_grandparents.html "What Adoptees Say About Adoption" http://www.keepyourbaby.com/adoptees_and_adoption.html Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Yarr	His mom doesn't feel comfortable having you and him share a room and your already preggo? Anyone else find that ironic? Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Pip	Your body, your baby, your life, you have support so do not let your mother get to you. All she is interested in are her own feelings and what you want is far more important than her selfish feelings. You are in no way selfish and should feel proud of yourself for standing up to her. At the end of the day she is the one losing out whereas if you surrendered you would regret it for the rest of your life. Stand firm and be a proud mother who wants to raise your own child and the very best wishes for your future life as a family. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

7rin	In my experience, time is the only thing that'll help your mom come around. My mom went ballistic when she found out I was pregnant, and said all sorts of stuff. We didn't speak for a few months, and then I had to send my then-boyf round to ask her if we could talk, 'cause I missed her, even though she absolutely loathed him (for reasons other than getting me pregnant). My daughter's 18 now, and me and my mom are ok. It's still not perfect because I still do stuff she doesn't agree with, but I think she's learned to live with the fact that I'm not - nor ever will be - her. Like I say, it takes time. Good luck with things evening out. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

love my life	Your mom is hurting right now. You can tell her in a nice way that you are sorry if she feels that you are throwing your life away but it is your life and your child. Tell her that you want her to be a part of you and the baby's life. Because she is after all your mom and the baby's grandma. She will probably come around after the baby is born. Give her time. Parents get angry when they think their kids are messing up and won't listen. But as time goes by they usually come around. Just try to keep communication open with her. If it were me I would still call her when the time comes, she may change her mind and be there for you. Good luck Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Anha S	My amom lost her mind when she found out I was pregnant. When I refused to adopt out my child, she disowned me. She missed the first 3 years of her grandchild's life because I didn't just bow to her and do as she said. She didn't want to have to handle the "embarassment" or the fact that I went against her religious beliefs. I also got the whole throwing away of the future bit too. I can safely say she truly and deeply regrets her actions now. In the end, I was still the one who reached out to her, and we have a rocky relationship, but we have one. Time, and unfortunately it may be lots of it. That's really the only tip I can give you re: your mom. You aren't throwing away your future. A baby isn't some kind of living death sentence which renders one incapable of moving forward and upward in their lives. Please know that you aren't being selfish either. It's not selfish to want to raise your own flesh and blood. I'm glad you have a support system who is there for you. But I'm so sorry about your family. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Ferbs	You can't make your mom come around. She has some valid feelings even if she doesn't express them in the nicest way right now. You have support from his parents so that's a positive. Keep the door open with your mom. Tell her that you know she's disappointed but that your choice is made. However, you would love for her to be part of all this and that you will welcome her involvement when she ready to be part of your lives in a supportive way. But please remember, being supportive doesn't mean always agreeing with your decisions. If she can prove herself to be a good grandma...your son will benefit that much more. This said, she has lived a life longer than yours and may know the pain and pleasure of having a child so she speaks from experience. You are throwing your future as you knew it...that's a fact, because now your new reality is being a mom and doing that 100% regardless of what others tell you about being able to DO IT ALL. You need to do ALL YOU CAN for your son now. Your needs are secondary. Still important of course but secondary. You chose to be a mom to this boy...time to do it. Glad your BF is involved and he has supportive parents. I favour the two of you getting married and doing this on your own when you can (no big wedding necessary) so that you can build on your new family...the three of you. Good luck. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Bapples	why the hell does she plan your future. Its your life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! She'll come around. My friend Jess's mom did that too her too and now all she wants to do is be around her grandchild. Ignore her and wait. She needs time! Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Fuaite le fuil, gaolta go deo	Some people are unreasonable. You are NOT throwing your life away! You can finish your education and have a wonderful life with your baby. I had my son right after highschool and I managed to continue my college education, I'm so glad that I kept him; anything else would have been devastating!! My parents didn't want me to have children for at least five more years but after seeing my son, they fell head over heels. She'll probably come around but once you have your baby it won't matter so much, his well being will be more important than your mother's happiness. Good for you for keeping your baby, disregard the b*tchy remarks from other users, they just don't want to see mothers raising their own children. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Melissa	Well, for one, you can respectfully let her know that this is YOUR life, and not HERS, so she is in no shape, way, or form, to "plan" your life for you!! Good grief, what is with parents these days!!! YOU AND YOUR BOYFRIEND are now a unit of parents, and have, therefore, to make decisions together, without parental butting in. They are not your baby's parents, they are yours, but now you are an adult and it is none of her business. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

DevonChaos	My mother did the exact same thing. She kicked me out at first, then let me and my ex move in with her, then after the baby came, she kicked us out again. You need to just remember that you are doing what is right for YOU and for your baby. Your mother and father will most likely come around when they realize that they aren't going to change your mind. They are going to want to see their only grand kid, and their only daughter again, and they are going to know that they need to be on their best behavior when they do. Stay strong. This is a hard time, but it is going to get easier. Things aren't going to stay tough forever. I wish I had the right words to tell you to say to your mother to make her turn around, but it really takes time. Send her a birth announcement if she hasn't talked to you by then. Send her pictures. I'm sure it won't take that long either. Don't forget that your boyfriend's mother is so supportive. She can probably help you by lending a comforting ear. I've been there honey! I wish you and your baby the best. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

LGM	Personally, I think you are doing the right thing. You still can have a career and get education, once your child is a bit older. And now you have a lot of energy for your baby. I think, your mother loves you a lot and is upset you won't reach everything she has dreamed of for you - so she is trying to force you to what she thinks is the best for you. Your father just doesn't know what to say, that's quite common in men. I expect both your parents will come around and will want to dote on their grandchild eventually. Unfortunately, right now, you seem to be the mature one in your family. Just cut the ties for now, and by the time you have settled in with baby at your boyfriend's mom, send them a nice birth announcement card and invite them to come over to visit. They'll come. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

kitta	I have met a few mothers like your mom in my work. She had other hopes and plans for your future and she is taking your "now different life" as a personal failure on her part...it would seem. What a sad situation for her..really. She has a grandchild coming and that is a blessing. Do you have a mutual relative who could reason with her at some point? She might listen to a more neutral person. And some of the things she wanted for you can be accomplished later. Maybe someone else could help her to see that you can still do many things with your life. Right now, first things first. You and your bf need to focus on the baby and your plans for the future as a family. I wish you well. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

dontknow86	My mom did the same thing to me. I wish I had someplace to go, I had to give my baby up. I still hate my mom to this day! My dad has no back bone just sat there. Everyone has told me I have let him off too easy. Keep your baby! You will be fine! Drop all contact with your mom and dad, Let them know they won you wont talk to them. I bet they will come crawling back, But make them make the move. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No