Can i see my child if i consider open adoption?

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Anna :)	try and become friends with the adoptive family and have an open adoption, they should let you see your child. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Brandi	I would interview potential families and get their opinion on open adoption. I personally would love to adopt a child and keep the birthmother in the picture. I would want my adopted child to know where and who they came from and why they were adopted.I think you just have to trust the people you chose to give your child to. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Ferbs	I wish I could say the skeptics were totally wrong. But they are not. It is up to the adoptive parents if they choose to honour the promises they made. Open adoption is possible and very beneficial. It is up to the parent (you) to decide on the level of openness. Then the potential adoptive parents can choose to agree or not. In our case, we had to state our intentions about that before the licensee would present our family to anyone interested in placing. We have an open adoption and it's working out well. It's the only way we would go. We kept our word. We visit with our son's bio mom when she is in the country but keep in touch often through emails. We will be vacationing with her and her daughter. It isn't the same for everyone. But it does work. ETA: You're not a lowlife. What a cruel thing to say. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

LostPrincess	It depends on what you and the adoptive parents come to as an agreement. I do know of some friends who have adopted a child and the birth mother is allowed to come and visit the child twice a year for a day, though the visit is supervised by the adopted parents and there are quite a birth of stipulations and "rules" so to speak with regards to the visit. So I assume that it would be up to what you and the adoptive parents decide to work out. But I have to agree with most of the other posts, your chances to see your child again are slim. The resent People magazine actually has a story about a mother who gave her daughter up for adoption with the promise of being able to have visitation, but the adoptive parents refused to honor it. She is now attempting to regain her parental rights of the 5 year old and have her removed from the adoptive parents, even though the birth father is siding with the adoptive parents stating that the little girl should not go back with the birth mother. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

bigclaire	I adopted my baby girl 2 years ago in an open adoption. My house always has been and always will be, open to the young woman who gave birth to her. She comes over when ever she wants to and I welcome her. Unfortunately, she chooses to come over only every few months. I understand that she's young and has gone back her old self but I feel that her presence in my babies life is very important. What child of adoption wouldn't want their birth mother available to them? really, though, it depends on who adopts your child. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

thats me and joe swash!	hi, i'd just like to say, to the mothers who have lost their children, i am really sorry. i know that really hard times and choices must have made you give them up for adoption and im really sorry that you dont know if your children are even ok. if your considering adoption, why not try temporary foster care? that may give you a chance to sort things out, or space to do what needs to be done, while still having regular contact and then having your child come home? i grew up in care, there is no way in hell i would consider putting my children up for adoption. But my mum was a junkie so she couldnt raise me herself, what with all the drugs and men. she done what was best really, but it screwed me up as a teenager because by then she was dead and i had no real sense of belonging. so think hard before you give up your child. its not easy raising children but i feel truly blessed every time they cuddle kiss or smile at me. giggles just make me melt. you dont need to be rich to give your child the best start in life, just do your best and beleive in yourself xxx Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

7rin	Please read http://www.bringperihome.com/history.html before you begin to believe whether open adoptions work or not, and read then http://lifemothers.com/thewall.html just so you're sure. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

smarmy	Only if you're very lucky. And just to be fair, some surrendering mothers can't watch their child being raised by others. Just food for thought. It might be you who breaks contact. Not that it happens a lot, but it does happen. Not enforceable. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Karij	I don't think this is an answer per se because I just had my son on 09/12/09 and walked away from him on 09/13/09 and I just KNEW I was doing the right thing....until I started getting pix with my son and the family and read this post! The family that adopted him had adopted a baby girl from the same agency BUT the girl's birth mom is NOT in the pic so the "family" does not have to deal with her the way they would with me. So I have to agree with ETA believe it or not. And thanks to Sunny b/c I am going to get down to reading, researching & making up my mind before it is too late. Thank you all for your insights. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

(_9$)	There's no such thing as an "open" adoption. They can write up anything they want and make it look like legal paperwork, but if it's not a law to begin with, there's no way of enforcing it. Search out single mothers, they'll tell you how to make everything work. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

kitta	Open adoption is not like being in a custody arrangement. You won't have any parental rights. What a biological parent does in an adoption is called 'surrendering parental rights." This means that your child no longer has any legal connection to you. The adoptive parents are considered the legal parents. Adoption means "to take as one's own." The adoptive parents are considered, in the law, to be the child's parents as if the child was "born to " them. They get to make all of the decisions regarding your son, including whether you would get to see your son, or even for him to know who you are. If you really want this child, consider raising him. I lost my son to adoption many years ago, and it hurt both of us...a lot. Adoption is not a way to have your son.....not if you really want to raise him and have him in your life. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Andraya - Snark's Sister	You will be at the mercy of the adoptive parents. I was promised updates and pictures. Eleven years later I don't even know if my son is alive or dead. My avatar is the last photo I have of my son, he was three in it, he will be 15 in November. Try to imagine having to look at one old photo for years knowing that may be the last picture you EVER see of your child. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

life is like the ocean	Don't count on seeing your child. Open adoption agreements are not legally enforceable and are rarely honored. The are used as a lure to get young naive women to sign over their babies, often with no intentions of being honored from the get go. I urge you to keep your baby. Whatever situation you are dealing with is more than likely temporary. Adoption is forever, and it hurts like hell. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

H******	Despite the sunshine and roses and promises you will receive, open adoption is not legally enforceable and is often used as a ruse to get your baby. Then, once the adoption is finalized, they'll kick you to the kerb. even if an 'agreement of open adoption' is signed, it is not worth the paper it's written on and you will have no recourse. It's a matter of trust really. And people desperate for a baby are very good actors. Proceed with caution. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Sunny	Most likely you will NOT see your child after giving them up. "Open" adoption is nothing more than a fancy carrot to get fence sitting mothers such as yourself to hand over the goods. It can't be enforced, and you'll be out in the cold. Very few "open" adoptions remain open. The adoptive parents are usually too insecure to allow it--how can they compete with the mother of their own child? Besides, adoption, except in cases of abuse, addiction or profound neglect isn't good for either YOU or your CHILD. Do some reading about what adoption really means to those who actually suffer the loss. http://www.nancyverrier.com/pos.php http://www.adoptioncrossroads.org http://www.amfor.net/ http://www.origins-usa.org http://www.motherhelp.info/index.htm http://www.babyscoopera.com http://www.bastards.org/bq/babb2.html Adoption studies: http://crimemagazine.com/07/adoptionforensics,0919-7.htm http://darkwing.uoregon.edu/~adoption/topics/psychopathstudies.htm http://www.angelfire.com/or/originsnsw/wendys_pres.html Books: The Primal Wound by Nancy Verrier Lost and Found: the Adoption Experience AND Journey of the Adopted Self: A Quest for Wholeness both by Betty Jean Lifton The Adopted Break Silence by Jean Paton The Girls Who Went Away by Ann Fessler Adoption: Uncharted Waters,by David Kirschner Being Adopted: The Lifelong Search for Self by David Brodzinsky Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No