Do you think a 2 x 12 months deployment would destroy a marriage?

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fliege52000	I hear so many different stories and I believe the marriage by the most people didn't survived. I can understand that some how, but for me is any excuse when the husband/wife get deployed and people getting separated after that. They knew before, the Army Life is not easy. So stick together and make the best. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

an88mikewife	It may destroy the weak marriages but not the strong ones. Not the couples who love each other unconditionally, 110% committed, and willing to work through anything. In fact, I think the deployments has made us stronger. We miss each other like crazy, we communicate better than when he is home because that is all we have right now. And when he comes home, we honeymoon until he deploys again. We are in our 3rd deployment together, married almost 4 years. We dont just survive a deployment, we THRIVE because of deployments. My father in law retired a CSM and he deployed 3 times during Vietnam and more times than that otherwise. My mother in law would tell anyone that they stayed married so long BECAUSE of the deployments, not in spite of them. It is all about how you look at it. If you think about a husband/wife who has been taken away from you to deploy, then you arent thinking about the good that can come of it. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

*~~Missin my Airman~~*	With love, anything is possible. It will not be easy, but if it is worth it for both parties, they will make it work out. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

GunnyC	Marriages can and have survived that and much worse historically, During World War Two men joined or were drafted went to training and were deployed overseas and returned home for the first time three years later; deployments were for the duration of the war not a set time period. Korea was done the same way but being a shorter conflict not as long as WW2. The current system of a set time in a combat zone then back to the US for a set time was first used in the Vietnam conflict and has carried over since then. Many military marriages do fail because of it but at the same time many survive it so it really depends on the strength of the marriage to start with. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Navy Sailor - GAI	Only if you are both super mature, can communicate extrememly well and you don't go have sex with the entire town because you "just wanted to be held." If no than no the marriage will not work out. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

bm3223	It really depends on the couple and the type of relationship they have. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Zeke Specialist	Accelerate Your Life lol Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Lost Wolv	you need a very strong marriage to survive that I think....and strong marriages aren't as common as they used to be these days. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Nurse Cyndi	if you have a strong bond and love you can do it, you'll both need to trust each other and have each others back you ll be fine Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Mrsjvb	deployments do not destroy a marriage. the people IN the marriage destroy it. The military has no more influence on whether a marriage survives than being a doctor, lawyer, Police officer or Teacher does/ Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Kellie D	My husband and I have survived our first deployment and have another next year and I am sure we will survive. I have seen many military families go through this and more and they have survived. Some will fail but so will some civilian marriages with no deployments. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Mary Jo's Ghost	Of course, if he has a decent wife to begin with. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Mark C	YES a marriage can work if both parties want it to work. It takes a lil extra effort on both parts. But yes it can work out. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

oscarsix5	It could put some serious stress on the relationship, but if a couple really loves each other and are devoted to making their marriage work it really shouldn't matter at all. If they continue to work on their relationship regardless of the distance involved. Quite a few of our grandparents and parents marriages survived the four years of World War Two and are still are as in love today. The failure of any marriage has only one direct source and that is the married couple themselves; everything else is merely excuse! Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Tsunami	if you love each other it can its just a matter of communication and loving each other. you have to decide but surely if you love each other now you will when he comes back that is for you both to know. its sad if you can't go year or even two he can get time to come home into that time of it also you need to spend time and talk it out and move on Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

JULIO R	If both have Commitment, Communication and Trust for each other, the marrage will last a life time. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

bayan a	if they love each other and if she can wait him as long as possible Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

darrell m	all depends on if you want it to work or not, you and your fiance are the only ones who can answer that. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

SSG Wells	depends on you and your fiance. i met my wife 3 1/2 years ago, and the past 2 out of 3 1/2 years I was deployed. 12 months in 2005, and 12 months again in 2007. me and her are doing great and it made our relationship stronger. the time apart sucks bunghole, but it can be done. Nobody would want to be put in a situation like that if they could prevent it. i was in the army already, so it's not like i could do anything to prevent myself from deploying. and I'm so glad my wife stood by my side. also know that i may deploy again in time because I'm still active army. right now my unit isn't going anywhere, but the possibility is always there. understand that there isn't a limit on how many times the army can deploy you if you're active duty. oh, and hey, there are quite a few marriages that don't survive deployment. but the ones that do make you stronger. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

thats_h0tt69	My husband is in the army as of right now he's in for eight years. He's overseas, and so far everything is good we've been married for almost two years. I say it depends on how the couple our and how strong their relationship is. I know a couple who has been high school sweethearts, and her husband has been deployed twice, and will more than likely get deployed AGAIN next year! They have a child together and seem to be surviving. It just depends...I can't say all marriages work while your husband/wife is overseas because some couples our different. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

nuttygurl25	it would be very tough but it depends how hard you want to work on make it work Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

hanibal turkey	it takes two to tango in a marriage if a couple truly loves each other and has a great bond and respect for each other than yes but all marriages are different no two are alike and some don't survive deployments but yes a marriage can and it does every day look at all of the military some of these men and families have been through not 2 but 6 or more deployments and they are still married with great families i firmly believe that true love conquers all Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Jay B	Well I been away from my wife for about 9 months(I'm in Korea)...If they trust each other not to cheat on each other & to love each other through thick and thin. It's even harder when they have kids....the soldier misses the kids the most..and the spouse wants the soldier home because basically..they can't handle the kids by themselves like that. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

ckck1978	Definately a marriage can survive that. its how strong is your marriage that your questioning it? its two years outta the rest of your life for a commitment to your country. Your call. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Ramblin Rose	I would agree with Island--it all depends on the couple, and the relationship dynamic they have. I know the lower ranking you are, (I believe E-1/E-4), the more likely you are to be divorced after a deployment (I had to do research on military suicides, and this was a fact I came across). I'm sure this is correlated to age at time of marriage, and is representative of all populations who marry young. My husband is on his 5th deployment. Because of the nature of his job, in the 5 years we've been married, I would guess he's been gone over 3 of those years (intermittently). It is extremely difficult to keep your marriage strong, especially when you live like a single mother the majority of the time. I know for me, absence doesn't always make the heart go stronger, it makes me feel angry at first, then independent, and finally disconnected. Infidelity, which everyone seems to think is the main reason marriages fail (which I beg to differ), has never been an issue in my marriage--yet we still have rocky times. I think our bottom line is we see our marriage as a partnership " 'til death do us part", and therefore, divorce is not an option for us. Having this mentality helps us figure ways to make it work, and in the end, we both want it to work. YOU BOTH have to want it to work--and it can. Marriage takes A LOT of work in the civilian world, and in the military, it's 20 times worse! Good marriages take work--if you and your partner are willing to put in the effort, there should be no reason why a marriage cannot withstand multiple deployments. With the occupations in Iraq/Afghanistan, there has been an increase in cases of TBI and PTSD, as well as physical disabilities. If service members do not seek the proper treatment and counseling, they are more likely to deal with their problems in unhealthy ways--drinking, isolation, withdrawl, etc. This of course leads to relationship problems, and many times, divorce. Luckily, marital counseling will become a benefit covered under Tricare--hopefully people will take advantage of this, and save their marriages. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Barry auh2o	During ww II, many men were drafted in 1942 and never got home until 1946 and their marraiges lasted. It depends on how serious you take your wedding vows. It is " for better or for worse," not, "for as long as it's convenient." If you want to make it work, it will. Remember, no one is forced to enlist.If you don;t feel you can handle such a seperation either don't enlistor don't get married. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Stevie	when both people are committed to the marriage, it will work. marriages can survive it.... look at all of the Generals and SGMs who have had several deployments and their wives are still with them. The way I see it... I dont have to like everything my husband has to do...but I need to support it. I would rather have him gone for a year and then get to see him again...than to divorce him and never see him again. When you love a person, you will work through the tough spots. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

uttermonkey	I'm in the Navy, not married but know tons of people who are. That question soley depends on the relationship level between the two. Some are married just for fun, other are for the pure love and romance of it and the thought that they'll be together forever. The answer I would say is: Dedication. Do you have what it takes to put up with all the problems that will come? (Oh yes, they will come). Just have to ask yourself if you're ready for this kind of relationship. ^_^ Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Lonya D	It doesn't have to. My husband is career army and he is gone all the time. Our relationship is stronger because we have to trust each other 100% in circumstances like this. If your relationship is rocky to begin with, then sure, the long deployments will be the nail in the coffin. Also, there are some types of people who are better suited to this type of lifestyle. Dependent, affectionate and emotional people do not do well when their partner is gone alot. Independent, self-driven people who need their alone time can thrive in this type of relationship. My husband and I have been together for 8 years and we have been separated 70% of that time. Sure, I miss him but we are doing just fine. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

island3girl	yes, it can as long as both partners are dedicated to one another and their relationship. Many, many marriages have survived that separation and more. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Tracey E	yes a marriage can survive that, thats easy compared to what most military couples go through. I married my husband in July 2001. He has deployed 3 times and I have deployed once; in 7 years of marriage we have almost 4 years of separation due to deployments. It just takes ALOT communication, love and understanding. Deployments do not ruin a marriage, the people in them do. A strong marriage will only get stronger a weak marriage will fall apart. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No