
IM JUST ME
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ur kids will benefit more if ur happy and honestly love someone and it hurts worse to stay with someone cuz u dont want to hurt them..than to be honest with them.. u dont want to live a lie...and ur partner doesnt want to be lied to or doesnt deserve to be lead by a lie ... it will be hard at first to confront the problem but in the long run everyone will find happiness ... good luck
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peter_bain2003
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you must have loved him once, seek help see if you can rekindle this relationship....the grass isn't always greener....
it's hard but good luck.....it takes two to love..
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dappersmom
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well staying together for the kids is no good, you are teaching them what love and relationships look like and i'm sure you want better for them. as far as not wanting to hurt him, you are hurting him everyday now, the difference is there is no end in sight. you aren't doing him any favors by staying when you don't love him all you are doing is keeping him from finding someone that does love him and thats just wrong, look at it that way. maybe your leaving will hurt him, but at least he'll get over it and have a chance at finding someone who loves him.
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doc
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true love is the only thing worth fighting for. take the kids too, they will probably have a good time. but remember things aren't always what they appear to be. yea
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Sufi
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you can only fall in love with someone else if there is a problem in your marriage. it existed before you fell in love with this guy. Can you fix or address the problem in your marriage. i recommend trying it. you could fall in lovve with your hubby again. focus on that.
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Phaylynn
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Yes, you should leave your husband and fight for love. If you kids are young it will be better to do it now than later. My dad and mom split up when I was little and I never really had a problem. Now my best friends parents split up when she was in high school and she almost failed when she had been a straight A student. Shot her chances with good colleges and had a ton of commitment/abandonment issues. Plus, if you have a chance to really have love you should take whatever risks you have to to get it.
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sorryna
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i think you should fight for your love and if you really want to do it i think you could find a way to not hurt your children and husband. as the time passes i think your sadness about your lost love will affect your family in a negative way and everybody will get hurt, so better a bit of suffering now than more suffering as the time passes!
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pickle
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staying with someone just for the kids is an awful mistake
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cosaxteacher
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You should channel that love to your husband who you made a life long commitment to. Remember the "til death do us part" line in the wedding vows?
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Matt
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Is the other man single? Were you in love with your husband
when you married him? You sound like you got married too young and I'm sorry for that. If it is a loveless marriage then you need to try to mend your differences or get a divorce. This other guy shouldn't be fooling around with you if he knows your married, because that will lead to trouble if you husband finds out. But that was good you pushed him away.
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TODSHISHLER
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Be carefull what you wish for.
You might get it.
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fishinpolen
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that's called lust with potential.....
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bhemsom
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never leave one relationship for another potentially equally doomed relationship. if you are not happy with your current, then leave for those reasons, if you hook up with this guy (assuming this is really what he wants) then you may be able to make that relationship work.
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kitty
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I don't normally put my life-changing questions on the Internet, but hey I guess it's worth asking.
This sounds to me like lust, you've found someone different than your husband. I think you'll regret uprooting your kids and your life if you go after this new guy. Think about the kids also. Then again, if you stay with your husband you'll always be asking "what if?". I say you just let time do its course.
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redpeach_mi
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hopefully you were unhappy with your husband before you met your co-worker. if you weren't, please reevaluate your marriage. don't leave for a crush. the grass always looks greener on the other side. try to work it out with your husband. then, if your marriage doesn't work, you can leave, knowing that you did all that you can do. don't ever leave one relationship for another because it will be doomed from the beginning.
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sharon51591
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your kids should be the most important part of your life. But, if its really not working with your husband. I would try and take a vacation just the two of you, see if it works out. If it doesnt, well then I guess you would get divorced
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irunwithscissors25
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follow your heart i would im not saying get a divorce but if you unhappy people you love will begin to notice that your miserable and in turn it may make them sad to see you that way you only live once do what you feel is right and to hell what others think. i understand the not wanting to hurt anyone but someday some how your husband will know that you don't love him that way and it ll hurt worse so just be honest with him well i wouldn't tell him about the other guy he doesn't need to know something like that. it would only blow his ego and he could use it against you in a court if you want to get a divorce you can do it yourself as well just a little FYI well i routing for you good luck best wishes.
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AugustMan
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End it with the co-worker and get back on track with your husband.
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Happy
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You need to think about your self. Why stay some where you not happy. Get those kid and run for your happiness. Life to short to be some where you not happy. The kid will be ok if you ok.
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c_schumacker
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In this society we don't admit it but "true" love is often over-rated and short-lived. In most romantic relationships the "in-love" butterflies-in-your-stomach feelings have run their course in a matter of a couple of years...and then you are left with another human who will undoubtedly have some sort of warts, possibly worse than your current husband. (It is very common for a person to divorce and marry another, then find themselves divorced again a couple years later.)
If you are truly miserable in your current relationship then get a divorce. Only after all of the dust has settled and another year has passed should you consider another long term relationship. If this is true love (with this guy at work) then it will be there in a couple of years when you are stable and ready for a relationship. It is not fair to your children, to have them experience the instability of your love life and the up's and down's it might take.
One more thing...do not get fooled into thinking "But I am different. This is real. We'll be together forever." I am certain when you were marrying your current husband and making children with him, you were not planning on it being a temporary arrangement. You are right to consider your children's feelings in this matter, but be objective and realistic. Do not let the romance impair your better judgement.
Good luck.
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said_akbar81
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I suggest,not to divorce your husband,keep intact with him,be away from your work mat,this all for normal future of your kids and yours.
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thedavecorp
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As much as I would want true love - you DID marry the man. You made a committment to him, legally, spiritually, bindingly. If you didn't love him, you shouldn't have married him.
Change jobs, change departments, whatever - but your duty is to your husband and kids. How many times did you date and it didn't work out before you found the man to marry? Are you so sure this would work out? Think about that.
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mjstwin0405
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fight for true love! The kids would rather see you happy then sad.
Parents Divorced!
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DJ
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Are you sure you are really in love with this guy at work? Attractions happen for many reasons, but once you get with this new guy and reality sets in you might not like him any better than your husband. He's new, he pays attention to you, he doesn't have any expectations of you, or judgements of you. But wait until you guys are fighting over money, the kids, jealousies, and seeing how ugly each other looks in the morning and with bad breath, and things might be no different than with your husband. At least give your marriage a chance first. Or ask your husband if he wants out too and work out something fair with him.
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conundrum_dragon
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Fight for true love..If you are sure this guy at work is serious in a long term relationship go for it.
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princess angel 2207
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leave your husband and be a mother to your children. thereafter you settle that. fight for the one you love.
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WataMelun
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figt 4 true love
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Dr Dee
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You should get another job, or prepare yourself to screw up your life.
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sassy_smart2000
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If I was you if you can't get control of your feelings I would be looking for another job.
http://www.chick.com/information/general/salvation.asp
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Curious
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You only live once -- do it right.
1. Try to see if you can channelize your love for your hubby.
2. Make sure, its not crush, but you love this person at work.
3. Make sure, its not crush, and this person at work loves you.
4. Follow your heart.
5. Look into the details too --
5 a) is the person willing to be a nice dad to the kids?
5 b) and other things like this that come with marriage.
6. Be careful of the syndrome-- the grass is greener on the other side.
7. Lot of evaluation has to be done with psychologist or a good friend.
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jason a
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staying with a person for the sake of kids is a terrible thing to do to the kids.
They see you unhappy , fighting,, it is wrong and you cant hide thing's like that from kids.
If you are truly unhappy then you just need to sit your husband down and have a long talk with him, after that you two need to talk to your kids..
then after all is said and dun go for the co-worker
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