I found pics on my hubby's computer of young women (almost girls). What do I do???

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¤¤Je§§ica¤¤	You need to confront him. He could have a real illness. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

hey you	were they under 18? over 18? photos from a site or ones someone sent to him.? i'd confront him on it and see what he says. good luck Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

sexy_lily2709@yahoo.com	U should never be afraid to stand up for urself ask him about it and make sure he has one hell of a good explaination. I am sure that if he found pictures on ur computers he would confront u Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Chilly	you're still thinking what to do????????????????? i'm upset and terrified !!!!!! why to waste time?????? go and ask him why they were there!!!!!!!!!! you are a fool if you let him go this way..... my dear.... stop wasting time...just do what a woman should do !!!!!!!!!!!! Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Sarah (the bear!)	if they are in a temporary Internet file, it could be that he was just browsing some porn sites and these pics happened to show up. if they are saved in a real file, that is something different entirely. you need to speak with him and find out why the images are there. ask yourself first- why are you TERRIFIED of confronting him? are you embarrassed or are you afraid for your safety? if its the latter, then you need to get out of the environment (porn is the least of your problems). if he did intentionally download these pictures and if they are in-fact truly upsetting to you, then you both need to speak with a marriage counselor to discuss the issue. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

dlcm1979	You definitly need to confront him. he might be so embarrased by this he might stop this kind of behavior. Also, you need to get into see a counseler right away to help you deal with this. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

ryan	EDIT: This applies to legal porn: Don't be upset, pretty much all guys do it. They don't mean harm, and 99% of the time they're still really attracted to you(or else they might be gone with the wind) Don't make a fuss, although probably all the girls will agree with you, but how do they know..they're not guys... ..If its really underage girls then that is really really disgusting! Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Healing_Rain	Ask him if the two of you can go talk to your minister tell him you have something on your heart...inform the preacher ahead so he knows then be ready....what he is doing is wrong and the preacher wil know this and you already do he just needs someone to tell him in a nice way and with this he gets it or not if not he may get a boot....good luck prayers are with you.... Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

debbie	Love him! Forgive him. I don't know what to do, but I know that forgiving him and letting go of anger before you even talk to him about it can make things a lot better. Your husband is a human, and we all have weaknesses. That doesn't make what he may or may not be doing right, but understand that he's probably not trying to hurt you with this, and still loves you tons. I would say that if you talk to him about it, try not to make it a confrontation, but let him know that you found them and maybe ask why he has them as gently as possible? I know that this probably makes you wonder if you're not good enough for him, but you are. You are the one that could be there for him with love at all turns. Pray for guidance. I wish you the best! (from one married woman to another) Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Kitty	So, he likes young women... Why is it a problem? Would you rather him have a grandma fetish? The truth is, people have all kinds of fantasies which best remain private. I've known folks (normal well-adjusted people) who got off on pregnant chicks and hermaphrodites. If you have a problem with your husband's fantasy world, perhaps it's something you can bring up and discuss - but it's not something to be "terrified" about. Unless the stuff he has is illegal, of course - but from what you said, it doesn't sound like it. Get your bearings, and talk to him. Just keep in mind that everyone has a fantasy or two. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

old-softy	ok. being a guy who enjoys his porn (but not the kiddie kind) I can kind of relate to him in the fact that I hide it from my wife. Why? Because I don't think she is ok with it. That and I wouldn't want my kid to find it. so I hide it. Now, that said. I disagree with anyone, male or female who exploits children in porn. It's illegal for a reason. Turn him in to the local police if you are sure they are underage. If in doubt, then ask him about it. if you want to discuss this more IM me Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

juicy_wishun	If they are young, but not "kiddie porn", then that is a matter between the two of you. I would talk to him about it, as calmly as you can manage, and explain how much it bothers you, and why. If the photos are of underaged girls, then you have a duty, responsibility, and moral obligation to turn him in to the authorities. Not becasue he deserves to be punished, but because it might lead to the arrest of the bastards who make child porn. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

lidybeff	In my answer I am presuming that the porn is not of underaged girls. Well, I know I'm going to get into trouble for saying this.. sigh.. But! Most men are visual creatures, and they enjoy looking at sexy women. It's a natural thing. From where I see it, you have three choices: 1. You can make a scene and demand that he stop it.. bad move. 2.You can tell him that you need reassurance because you're feeling threatened, then turn a blind eye to it. or 3. You can buy him a loving and thoughtful present of DVD's specifically to cater to his personal taste, and sit and watch them with him !! I'd be going for the latter, but the choice is yours ! Don't be hurt, it isn't about you, it's just a guy thing. Just be glad he isn't looking at other guys ! Then you'd have something to worry about! :o) Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

jcurrieii	Talk about a loaded question... Now, for the answer. Is there anyone else in the house that uses the computer? Have you ever had guests/family stay a couple days and use the computer? If the answer to either question is a "Yes," your hubby may be innocent as the proverbial lamb. If the answer to both questions is a "No," he may still be innocent. Simply surfing the 'net without a 100% impermiable firewall and A/V and A/S (etc) will result in pornographic images finding their way onto your computer even if you NEVER open a pornographic website, or spam e-mail. (Assuming the images are of a "graphic" nature.) Incidentally, there is no such thing as 100% protection on-line. Are the pictures in question located in a single folder? Is it a system folder buried umpteen folders deep in the system? Or is it located in a reasonably easy to locate folder? If it is in a system folder with some undecipherable name, it is likely an innocent happenstance. If they are scattered across many folders in there is an approximately equal probability that he is guilty as not. If the photos are in a single innocuous sounding folder not in a system directory - especially if he was silly enough to put it in the "My Pictures" folder - he is likely guilty. That having been said, men look at picures of a sexual nature for many reasons, and most of them are not explicitly for the objectification of women, but for fantasy reasons. Some do for personal pleasure alone, some to try to learn new things to try on their partners...consider it a cheap version of the Kama Sutra, but without all the helpful additional instruction. ;) Some do it for boredom...nothing on TV, and the spouse isn't home. Some because they enjoy looking at the pictures. Some just do it to "prime the pump" as it were for you! I know of one wife that told her friends when they were shocked that she let her husband go to strip clubs, she couldn't care where the (arousal) came from (porn - within limits / strip clubs / etc), so long as he brought it home for exclusive use with HER! In short, for much the same reason as you ladies (yes, a generalisation) like the Harlequin (sic) Romance novels, which in some cases, due to content are technically not legal for sending through most National Postal Services, and definately wouldn't be if they were illustrated! As to whether or not you should confront him, do so, but in a non-hostile manner. If you push him to become defensive, he will react in a bad way. Once you are talking about it, ask him why he does it. Incidentally, if the images are of minors...that is a WHOLE other discussion, and will require, possible psychiatric intervention, if not police action. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

MOs fishin	you need to tell him that it bothers you and you might need to seek counseling, because it sounds like the pictures are of girls that are way younger than he needs to be looking at. MO Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

bainaashanti	I can definitely see why you're upset, I would be too! I'm really sorry you have to go through this. My advice would depend on why you are "terrified" to confront him. If it's because you were snooping when you found them, I can understand. If it's because he's violent and you're afraid he will hurt you, then you need to get out of that house and get some help from your local domestic violence agency. If you're afraid that you will find out that your husband is a pedophile, I can understand that too. Ulimately, you have to confront this issue (unless he's violent, then your safety becomes the issue) and find out what's going on with these pictures. When you say "almost girls", if this is kiddie porn (people under the age of 18), then you may have to involve the authorities, because this is a federal crime (not to make things worse for you). What you really need to understand is that pedophiles continue on and only get worse when people help them hide their crimes. Hopefully, your husband can get some help and get better. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

eivuwan	If you don't confront him, it would always be on your mind, so even if you are afraid you'll just have to. You should sit him down and start by asking him in a neutral way how he feels about this relationship and things like that. Then confront him about it. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

texas mom	If they are children I would have to tell the cops! But that is me, I have children and would not men looking at naked pictures of my children. If your hubby is looking at naked kids they are someones children. Do you have kids? I would NEVER have anyone spend the night for fear of what he may do. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

cr4zie.puppet	talk to him! Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Godless AM	If they are truly underage, confront him. If it is just porn, leave it be. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Snot Me	ask him why they were there see what answer he gives. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

hellokitty760	If they are children I would call the police! Talk to someone close to you that understands your situation! Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Callie	upset and terrified? He should be the one who is upset and terrified. Dude, I know its hard when you love someone, but you have to do what it right and there is no negotiating that. Grow some balls and confront him. Good luck. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

youcandoit	I know your terrified but you need to talk to him. Tell him you saw them tell him how it makes you feel and you are going to have to decide if he doesn't want to stop what you will do about it. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

wizjp	Your description is a little thin. You don't seem to be talking kiddie porn. If he's looking at adult porn and it bothers you, talk to him about it. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

BabeHeart	Why are you terrified to confront him? If you feel he may harm you then why are you with him in the first place? Copy the files so you have a backup, then definitely confront him about them. Don't scream and yell, but ask why pictures of very young women are on his computer. Hear him out, then go from there. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

BrushPicks	If its underage, contact the cops. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

howie r	aplogize for snooping and then ask him why he has these pictures on his computer.... what in the world should you be terrified about. if they arent children then its not illegal. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Harvick 29 Fan	Are the pictures on his computer of people younger than 18? if they are, you not only need to confront him, but you should report him and get the heck out of there. If they are of people that are over 18, then just brush it off to the fact that he likes to look at dirty pics Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Consul of Rome	Were they nudes? Underage? A lot depends on what kind of pics you found Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

CHRIS	Darling, you need to listen to the way you are talking right now. You are all upset and need to try to calm down. When we are upset our judgment goes out the window and nothing makes any sense. Try to find a way to calm yourself down, first. When you are as upset as you clearly are is not the time to be trying to think about how to deal with it. You first have to deal with being so upset. The idea is to get you under control first. Your husband isn't going anywhere. He is going to be right there when you are calm and ready to speak with him about this. If this were my issue, I would first work within myself to get my bearings. I am no good to myself nor to anyone else when I am all upset and waving my hands in the air. I hope you will not take offense at my telling you to calm yourself, but when we are all upset, we are not thinking clearly, and we often will not say nor represent ourselves clearly to others, or in this case, you, to your husband. As upset as you are, you are bound to be a disappointment to your own position, so calm down first. I am definitely not makiing light of the situation. I am just strongly advocating for a much more centered and peaceful version of YOU before you call all of this out on the kitchen table for a nice long talk about getting priorities clear so the two of you can continue your marriage. The way you speak with him, and what the two of you actually say, is beyond my domain. That is and should be between the two of you. A woman needs to be very deliberate and centered when she wants to make her needs or feelings known to someone else. Think about the importance of becoming quiet inside before you speak to him, and I think you will see why this is and will always be the thing I focus on most strongly. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No