Husband trouble - any advice?

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Tuckster	Dump his ***, he obviously doesn't care enough to not hurt you, regardless of the "drink talking". Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

moonchild	You can't help they way you feel and can't anyone tell you how to feel. If you feel like trying, you try. If you feel like you can't get past it let him go. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

chickypie	You guys absolutely have to talk about this, and you cannot let it go until you do. If everyone pretends nothing happened, he will forget about it and be okay, but you on the other hand will always be stuck-stuck in trusting him, stuck in feeling like 2nd best, stuck in wondering all the time about everything and that is no way to live your life. If he refuses to talk tell him then that you will have to file for divorce because you cant pretend nothing happened like he is. If he does talk to you about this, find out if he seems genuine about his mistake and whether or not you can handle his excuses to make it work. It will be a very long process in getting back to where you first were but it is possible. Both of you will have to work equally as hard tho. Check out the book called "the five love languages" this may help you as it has helped many others. Good luck to you! Remember everything happens for a reason! Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

sanguis	You are a fool for trying to. Don't make excuses for him, or listen to his. There's obviously something going on. File for divorce ASAP. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Jayda J	For your husband to even make such a comment to you is utterly dispicable. Why is he even looking for something outside of what he has at home? Since he married you, shouldn't you be the only "soul" he's concerned with? You are a much better woman that me. I'd have kicked his a** and asked questions in the courtroom. Life is far too short to worry about whether your spouse is committed you and your marriage or otherwise. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

mmurray001	First of all he chose you to marry and if he was attracted to someone he is only human perhaps this person has some of the qualities that you have. You are not a fool for trying he is your husband and want to be with him. Try and get over this and maybe you two can work it out, but keep the line of communication open. best of luck. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

scorpio_girl	I think you should confront him head-on, how long ago did he meet her was it before you or just recently? If it was long ago I would so just be wary of the situation, if recently then I would definately evaluate the marriage. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

advice?yeah	talk to him....tell him how you feel, its the only way to work things out and decide on a solution Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Honeyface	Sorry, but my vote has to be for the "fool" thing. You can't go back, and he is a lowlife. Cut your losses while you can. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Jersey Boy	What your husband said is merely a symptom of a bigger problem. I strongly suggest marriage counseling to get to the real reason for his comment to you. Marriage counseling will help decide whether the marriage can be fixed or not. At the least it will get you both to a better place. Good luck. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

iyamacog	In your shoes, I would probably tell him how I feel. And ask him to find a place to stay, until you're able to resolve your feelings one way or another. Someone will make some kind of decision within a week. I guarantee it. The issue is, what will happen next. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

jollybear	dont let it kill you let it out your heart and talk to him about it talk it over dont let issues hang over for a long time it will kill your relatonship its a bad thing he said that to you but it also depends on your relationship but remember when you tlak to him about it do it in a nice way dont shout to him or anything just relax and talk to him in a loving way pour your heart out dear dont be scared Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

slave2art	You will (together) need to heal and be given time to forgive him. It takes time, his constant reassurance and maybe some professional help. He shouldn't be "carrying on as though nothing ever happened" and you should make that very clear to him - hourly if need be. He's the one who strayed so the ball is in your court now and he'll have to live with the person you've become because of HIS poor choices. P.S. Sounds like he shouldn't be let out to drink. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

mommeof3	Marriage counseling is what you need. If he has those kind of feelings from just looking at another woman there is a problem. You two need a way to get this out in the open and talk the issues through. A professional will listen to what is being said with an open mind and ask pertinent questions. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Go Bears!	Go to marriage counseling - with or without your husband. What he said was hurtful and I nor should anyone else expect you to just go on with your marriage. You need to address why your husband doesn't see you as his "soul mate." Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

No one	From the outside looking in....not knowing either of you but just what you have told us....I would say his actions speak louder than his words. If it truly was alcohol talking, then his actions would be trying to make up for a drunken indiscretion. The fact that he is acting indifferent to you would make me believe that at some level he believes what he said. I hope I am wrong though. Good luck. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

umannjo	Like I say every time in my responses where drinking is involved.. Drinking is NOT an excuse for ANYTHING. If you do anything drunk then you would subconsciously do it sober. You two need counseling.. but be prepared.. sounds like he is ready to stray. You deserve better though. "soulmate" is a serious word and should not be taken lightly, nor thrown around like it's nothing. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Masho	I would be weary of his emotions and any suspicious activites. Go with your gut. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Byte	Great ! sounds like you have a wonderful husband NOT. Sit him down and ask for an explanation.....and dont accept second best. Ask him how he would feel if the shoe were on the other foot. Good luck hun Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

SICILIANBEAUTY	I agree with Fluke... His mistress dumped him and now he wants to work things out with you again Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Mystery	this would change my feelings towards someone straight away. obviously something has happened between them that they have both acknowledged on some level. time to say goodbye unless you're willing to face a long, difficult journey to trust with no definite light at the end. he's moved on, so should you. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Lioness	Alcohol doesn't force you to "make up" things - it lowers your inhibitions. So, a fact he may kept to himself came out because he was drinking. Now you need to weigh your options and think about what you want to do. If my husband who I am madly in love with, said that to me, I would tell him, "Well, I hope she makes you happy, " and show him the door. I would never want to play 2nd fiddle to any man. What a blow to your ego. You deserve better. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

ROY T	I dont think you are a fool i think he is incredibly insensitive and is trying to say something but not sure exactly. Try having a discussion about it and let him know you need reassuring ..... at the end of the day you need to know who he is thinking more about, you or her. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

val f1 nutter	he's stamped on your heart. take a break and see what you want to do. if you stay together you may need counselling. personally if it was me i would be gone. i wish you luck Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Ahdunno	Your husband loves somebody - it aint you he gets his food cooked and clothes cleaned and house cleaned - by you of course he is gonna prolong you bein his slave Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Nancy Kay	drunk or sober, for him to tell you that shows he no longer considers you his primary concern...i don't think you shold keep him as yours... Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

genie405	alot of people say things when they are drunk that they don't mean. But some also say things they mean and normally wouldn't have the courage Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

mayihelpyou	Sit him down and tell him exactly how you feel and will continue to feel about what he said. It's up to him to make you feel like you are first. Then you may be able to get over what he said. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

SweetPea	Pack him a bag and change the locks next time he's out of the home. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

fluke	I think she left him for some reason so now he is pretending it never happened. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

DeltaForce	Huh? He confessed his love for another woman, but that was three weeks ago and no one has raised the topic sense? That's weird. My view comes down to how much you have invested in this relationship. If it is fairly new and you don't have kids and can get out "clean", you might consider it. On the other hand, if that's not the case, then I recommend you get yourselves to a marriage counselor. That was quite a bomb he dropped on you. You can't just leave it sitting there. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No