Did I make the right choice?!?

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Nicole K	No, it isn't wrong to say what you felt. You were being honest. But, I think you should do your best to help her out. I understand that you guys are going through a rough time, but she's family. And, your husband may feel a little hurt. I mean, what if it was your family? I think you'll feel a lot better if you agree, because you know you're doing the right thing. But never be afraid to speak your mind! Tell her that you really can't afford to have them for a really long time, etc. etc. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Patrick T	It's as much your decision as it is your husbands. This decision will affect the both of you. While it is important to convey your message, it is also important to maintain a respectful tone and delivery of your message to ensure that you avoid confrontation on your home front. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Navan	No! you weren't, You were right and your husband may be hurt with your decision now, but later on he will see that your were right. It's wrong for his sister to ask this of you because she knew that the E bill was due. If she is concerned for her children, she would have made sure to ask her boyfriend/ex for the money. If he is living with her, its his responsibility plus her ex, to support the children and they should come first. She is not thinking about her children as all she wants is a good time at the expense of someone else. If you let her live with you. You would be paying for everything and her boyfriend as well. She is wrong. You have to be cruel to be kind. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

55 and trying	You were correct!!! This was just a ploy to make you feel sorry for her and let them move in and then you would never get them to leave. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

sandra g	No you were not. The boyfriend did not forget to pay the bill. If so he could wire the money for it to be paid. There should be an organization that will help her pay the bill since she has kids. Its usually a county office. Call you public salvation army or red cross they can give you the names of who can help. Its okay to help out. But a month. Maybe a night or two. However, I don't think you would get them out without causing hard feelings. If you are already having trouble making it you don't need the stress. They must not have the money or someone spent it on something else. This is the best way to keep peace in the family by them staying out of your house. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

k3m2d4	no, i don't think you were wrong. maybe you could help her by paying the light bill if you are able to? or maybe there is a way that she could get money wired from her boyfriend? and the fact that she is on welfare, means that she get assistance, so maybe she could look into that. and if they have to light candles a few nights untill all is cleared up, that would be ok too. and as long as they have somewhere else to go as well, and ur not just leavning them to fend for themselves, then i think you did the right thing. especially if you were going to feel used. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

miss.mongoose	Nope, you were 100% right to tell him how you felt. If she has other places to go, then don't worry about her. From your husband's point of view, he has two women he loves demanding different things from him (and I use "demanding" in a passive sense only) and he's stuck. Which ever one he sides against is going to be mad at him. It's a rough spot, so keep that in mind. Tell him that you and your child are his immediate family, and it is in your best interests not to have them there. I doubt he will argue against you very much. Since you said he only seemed a little upset, I think deep down, he doesn't want to be responsible for his sister either - he just doesn't want to be in the tight place he's in right now. It will pass when she finds another place to stay. He'll breathe an inner sigh of relief. Just keep in mind how he's feeling when you discuss it further - he's got pressure coming from two places (and more, if the rest of the family gets involved) where you only have your own situation to address. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Silver Angel	That's a tough one. WOW. I totally understand your position though. You're afraid that once your sister-in-law moves in she'll never want to leave. Explain this to your husband and see what he says. I hope everything works out for you. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

fantabu1ous	Family is family and there may be a time when you need to turn to his family for support. However, if her boyfriend forgot to pay the bill, he could pay it over the phone, or better yet she could pay it unless she has no access to the account. Rather than offer a roof over their head try teaching her how to be a responsible adult, show her how to get a job and send the kids to day care that way she may actually learn to become independant. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Hey There	I'm gonna have to say no because you can't be wrong to say what you feel but it is really up to you on how you want your relationships to be Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Kinx	no its ok i wouldn't want other people living with me and plus ur going threw hard times so no ur doing somthing good Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

msblack24	NO AND THEN TO BRING THE EXTRA KIDS....girl u did the right thingu cant keep another womans child and her...she knew her hubby didnt pay the bill so shouldnt she have been borrowwing money or working or asking the hubby? i know ur hubby is sad but if she comes now shell never leave. dont feel bad just talk to ur hubby about it and let him see what u mean.good for putting ur foot down.this could be a bad situation if u would have done otherwise! Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

autumn	you have to take a stand. If she has other options then let her take them - you have your own family to worry about. If anything - offer to watch her kid a few hours a day so she can go get a job & off of welfare - once she has a job in place tell her about the apple program - governmet daycare assitance for low-income families be a helper - not an enabler Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

just_to_be_	you did the right thing... i think.. coz if ever you let her live with you for a bit then everytime something happened she will be running to your husband or maybe worst.she will decide to stay forever. she has somewhere to go anyway or maybe your husband lend her money to pay for the electricity. i think this is much better than she lives with you. you have to try to explain to your husband what you feel. 3 kids 3adults in a house is way too much..and believe me you will all be miserable... Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

tshnobodysfool	He should just pay her stupid light bill or she should get a loan for it. I would say she's taking advantage of the family relationships. As a grown woman with kids, she shouldn't be his responsibility. No you're not wrong and shouldn't have to deal with that on top of being pregnant. Offering to help her out if you want to is one thing but that sounds like a nightmare to me if she moved in. I believe in caring for and helping people but no way would I do that. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Twilighter	no. since she had other places to stay, its good you got your feelings out there. just remeber if it was YOUR sister (or bor or mom/dad) who needed to live wioth you. that changes things. tell him you are sorry again and hopefully hell get over it. good job for standing your ground!!!!! snaps for you! Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Colon Blow	No, you were not wrong in my opinion. You (and your husband) have to strive to put your marriage above all else. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

♪ ♫Jin_Jur♫ ♥	No, it's your house too and you have every right to be comfortable there. I would say it's a little harsh but then again a month is a long time to have people living in your house. If your husband still feels bad maybe he could loan or give his sister the money to pay the bill. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Evy	Being that she is on welfare she can go to them and they will pay the bill for her. Trust me. If you let her into your home you may have a hard time getting her out. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

bayou_babe1111	No, you werent wrong. If he didnt want to hear your true feelings, he shouldnt have asked you. He'll get over it. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

midnight_mau	You werent wrong, but the fact that she is family should mean something. If you dont wish for her to live with you, that is fine, but you should at least offer to help her a bit. But no, yo uhave a right to say what you felt on the situation. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

soulaira	Ok, so her husband left4 and forgot to pay the light bill before he left...in order for them to turn off the lights, they would have had to be delinquent for a number of months. And if he had just 'forgotten" to pay the bill, there is nothing saying he couldn't mail a payment from where ever the heck he is. No I think you were absolutely right in saying how you felt. She's an adult with children. It's time she got off her butt and started making the right decisions. Some people want others to care for them for the rest of their lives. And you shouldn't have to take care of your sister. I would see it being ok if she had fallen on hard times and this was out of the norm for her. But if clearly this is something that's a habit for your sister you did the right thing. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

fer	No...I agree with you....ask her to call to her boyfriend to send some money...that is easy to do... Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Melissa	Noo. But maybe you can help pay for the light bill and have them pay you back when her boyfriend gets back. She is family...so if you won't help her by letting her stay with you then you have to do something. What you told your husband is only wrong if you dont help her at all. I mean rent a hotel for her if you have to! Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

"08" grad.	no it was right of u too say what u feel but u could of thought of the kids more. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

*******	well, your husband should have told her no and not because you were against it. he should have just told her no, and sorry but she'll have to find an alternative. He can't blame you. he needs to support you. it's your house as much as his, and you have every right to protect it. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

.	No. You don't have to put up with other people or their kids if you don't want to. Your sister-in-law needs to take better care of her finances and everything else in her life. I wonder if her main goal is to get in, and never leave. I don't blame you a bit for saying no. Applauds you!! Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

♪♫♪♫ I'm Lovin' It ♪♫♪♫☮	us answering this question isnt gonna make you feel better or worse, in tha back of your mind, you know whether u made the right choice or not. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

Sufi	nobody fogot to pay the bill - they don't have the money. once they move in, it's very hard to get people like that out of the house. you need to talk to your hubby about the consequences of them moving in and why you said no. but your issue is with him and you need to talk it out with him and listen to his feelings too. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

texas tornado	No, not if she has other options. It could be her way of getting her foot in the door & then when her husb. gets back they are there for good. Way to stick up for yourself. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No

candymom419	why dont you offer to pay to have her lights cut on, make sure she has some groceries, if you can afford it. You still are being a very helpful and supportive person, plus not totally acting like a crutch. She may be lonely, and a little broke, but so is the rest of the world. Help her help herself. She has to learn to stand on her own. Was this answer helpful to you? Yes / No