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 Is it normal for a Woman to make her man sleep on the couch.....For 2 years?
Ever since my "wife" got pregnant with our child(4 + years ago) she has been distant. I have slept on the couch for over 2 almost 3 years (our daughter will be 4 soon). She keeps our ...

 Do you feel some stay at home moms (or house wives) take advantage of their husbands?
Some women I know don't cook or clean because their husband will do it for them. I'm not talking about marriages where both partners work. I'm talking about marriages where one is at ...

 My husband had a text messesage & he said that he let his friend use it for his girl friend?
I found a text mess on my husbands cell phone he said that he let his friend borow it because he did not have a cell phone when i found the text i called the # to find out who it was and she did not ...

 What's the average age to get married? Is 22 to young to get married?
I wanna get married at 22 is that to young?...

 How often should a married man go out with his singles friend?
places like: bar, club, strip club, party, or just hanging out drinking while watching a game....

 What sort of person gets involved with another womans man?
what sort of person would sleep with a guy who already has a partner ? what sort of person says "well it's fun and I don't care about his wife/girlfriend" And what sort of person ...

 I am pregnant and husband says he will leave me if I do not give the child up for adoption. What do I do?
My husband and I became pregnant and for the first 4 months, he was supportive and kind. It was a surprise, and not under the best circumstances; but really, when is it? The first time he felt the ...

 I am extremely cold and my husband won't let me put the central heating on!?
He has left for work this morning with specific instructions NOT to put the central heating on. He says that I can light the fire instead, but I'm too cold to go outside to get some fuel :-(

 Should I try to talk to my ex husbands new girlfiend?
My ex husband and I have been divored for 3 years I am getting married in 3 1/2 months. So I dont have anything against his girlfreinds. My ex and I have 2 beautiful little girls one is 8 and the ...

 Why did you get married?

 I've got a strange question.?
My boyfriend of 1 year is a great guy. The problem is that when we go to his parents house (cookout, birthday celebration) 9 times out of 10 he will go in the house (we are usually outside) and ...

 I need an opinion. Should I stop being friends with my ex wife?
My wife and I have lived apart for over 1 1/2 years, (divorce pending) but we remain friends and even get together about twice per month for a few drinks. Total platonic relationship.

I ...

 I have confronted my husband about pink hair found in his truck and he is denying any wrong doing. Now what?
Husband is an over the road truck driver and I found mass quantities of pink hair in his sheets and clothing.
When confronted he blew a gasket, turned the whole thing around on me and stormed ...

 After 8 years i told my gf that she was not good in bed?
she has married to someone else now and after a long time we were talking and in that conversation i mentioned to her that she was not good in bed and she got pissed out of this and cried a lot. Did ...

 I am married but recently I met a wonderful man and I'm falling in love with him more and more everyday...
What should I do?...

 Does a faithful man exist nowadays?
I dont think so because everywhere you turn marriages are ending men are cheating. I mean why do people even bother causing someone heartbreak to someone they claim to love/ care about.


 Not attracted to my husband anymore, what do I do?
He is a good man and a very loving father. He works hard and is very faithful to his family. I'm just not attracted to him anymore. I feel like I have to stay with him for finacial reasons and ...

 Why do so many men want to sleep with me?
I have so many men (mostly married) that I barely or don't really know come and tell me that they want to go to bed with me. I'm not a tramp, and I don't sleep around. And I don't ...

 How do I get rid of this rash in my butt my husband gave me after coming home from the strippers?

Additional Details

 Is my husband cheating on me if he goes to bars at night by himself?
He works late and somtimes decides that he wants to grab a beer on the way home to wind down. He always calls me beforehand to tell me that he is stopping, but why doesn't he just get a beer at ...

Tracy H
Am I being used? By my wife!!?
My wife of 11 years came home last Tuesday at 4:30am.
She went to the movies with another female and 2 males.

She has a history of meeting guys on the internet (but swears nothing happened).

I do have trust issues with her. In the past 6 years she continues to lie and act strange. That's usually how I catch her. I am sick of her dishonesty.

She is trying to play the "you don't show me affection/help with the kids/do your share of the housework" card as her defense.
Divorce or separation was never brought up until I questioned her whereabouts Monday night.

She left Thursday night as well. She came home at 1am.
I stayed at home and watched the kids. I didn't ask her where she went. I didn't want a lie, and probably couldn't handle the truth.

She says she wants me out.
She says we are finished.
When I ask if she wants a divorce she says she can't commit to one.
When I try to leave she says "Stay til you find a place".

I have to give her gas/food money because she spent her check on ?.

I am doing 95% of the housework as well as working 60 hours a week.

She says she will go to counseling but will not commit to our marriage. She says she needs me to move out asap (when I find a place). It's hard to find a place and pay bills here at home.

Her birthday is Tuesday and I offered to take her out. Not a date, just out. She says no.

She will allow me to take her to a concert next weekend. She says she will go with me if I want, and regardless she will go with or without me.

I think If I don't move out before next weekend she will have me watch the kids while she goes.
Additional Details
~from the wife in question.
we've been married 11 years. i got a job when our youngest child started school. He had not allowed me to get a job until then, he made me quit several part timers i had, which i got to keep us off FOODSTAMPS. when he gets home in the evening he checks the phones to see who i've talked to, he checks the computer to see what i've been doing.. then he sits down in front of the computer for the rest of the evening, strips down to his underwear, and web-surfs for good deals online. In the 11 years we have been married, I have had 2 friends, both female, both he accused me of sleeping with. he has told me since our first child was born that if i ever leave him he'll take her away, and he has followed up with the birth of our 3 children.
Last week i told him he has to leave (i had gone to the movies with 4 other people, 2 guys, 2 girls plus me) after work. As soon as i was off work my cell started ringing, i answered & it cut out... its a pre-paid cell

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when people don't want to be accountable they point the finger at the other spouse blaming them so they can justify their cheating.u need to seek a divorce,and custody of the children, and stop giving her money.

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You shouldn't have married her in in the first place if you say there has always been trust issues. Anyhow, leave her and make sure you have a good lawyer. You're being used and you don't deserve to be treated like this.

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Franco J
Dude, i only got half way thru it.
she is purely a whore.
she is and has been cheating on you.
get divorce and move on.
you really have to or else you gan2 keep on getting used and eventually she migh get an STD from one od those guys and u get screwd!!
divorce is the only way man

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Ive learned something about relationships, and that is I can be miserable by myself.I was once in a bad marrage it was not near as bad as your situation.We just couldnt get a long.Everything was fine as long as she got her way.Marrage is a 50/50 thing.I made the decision to cut my losses and move on no matter what I tried I couldnt make it work.I figured out the reason I couldnt was because she wouldnt meet me half way.Look, your wife is useing you dont let her make a fool out of you anymore.If she wants you to move out asap then take her advice and do it the sooner the better! Take your kids with you, you are watching them and caring for them anyway.Move on now with your life dont keep waiting.Quit letting her use you!

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This is one big mess: What is a bit shocking to me is why you have put up with all of this "bull" for so long.

Anyway, my advice to you is to go to see a psychotherapist, licensed one, ASAP; and try to gain insight through the session(s) as to what your present feelings are as to your spouse and also as to why you have allowed yourself to become a subject of her abuse.

Then, after consulting with a divorce attorney you trust, do whatever next step is best for you.

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Just asking
Shes a mom she can't go out and just do what she wants and come hom late. IT's not your job to do all the house work take care of the children and give her money all the time.
Yes I think she is using you so she can have a good time. I would divorce if it was me.

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You need to grow a set of balls. Why should you move out? You are paying the bills, doing the housework, and watching the kids? She wants you to move out? What the hell is wrong with you. Get a divorce lawyer, change the locks and sue her for support. Tell her that she isn't running your life anymore and she can go and stay with one of her boyfriends(tell her to take pictures for your lawyer). Throw her the hell out!!!!

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molly's creative username
That woman sounds like a nut, not to mention rather mean and manipulative.
Time to find yourself a lawyer.

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Alan J
Seems like you are the perfect man for her, bring in the cash, mind the kids etc while she goes out and plays...No wonder she doesn't want you to leave...Wake up and see you are being sucked in...

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It sounds like so.

If you stay in this situation, it means you are teaching your kids that it is ok to treat their partner like a crap, or if their partner treats them like a crap, they just need to keep their mouth shut and take it.

I'm sorry that you are going through this, but for yourself and your kids, you need to stand up and take an action.

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David D
Getting used. Why do we keep going back and getting used over and over again...

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҉♥Zainabs Muma & Due Sep҉♥
i would tell HER to leave... she has no respect for you, and she most certainly doesnt love you.. you say you have kids, you owe it to them, show them that its not okay for people to treat others like this!!

you can do better than her!!

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Stay in the house and continue to care for your kids. If she wants out, tell her to move (when she can). File for divorce and custody of the children. Don't give her ammunition to use by moving out. She'll play the victim and say you abandoned her and your children. Sadly, there are many courts who would believe her. She's being a jerk and obviously doesn't want the commitment that a husband and children require. Give her the freedom that she wants, but don't permit her to take your children from you. Yes, she is using you. Don't let her.

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Honestly, it sounds like she isn't committed and is moving on without you irregardless. If I were you, I would move on without her, as hard as that may be. She doesn't sound like she wants things to work out, especially as she isn't willing to committ to the marriage. Take whatever time you need to heal, then find another wonderful woman who will give what you deserve.

I would also go to a lawyer and see what your options are about getting custody of the children, if that is what you would like.

Best wishes.

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Man, you are in bad shape, quit now and stop being a wimp and a door mat for that ho ! Get a divorce attorney and dump that B&*itch !

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I think she is using you. If you need to leave take your kids and leave. Don't give her any money for her to go out. She is a grown woman and if she wants to stay out all night and do whatever, she needs to fund it. It seems to me that she can have you at home and go out with whoever and she knows that you aren't going any where. Let her know that you're sick of it and go ahead and file for the divorce if she won't commit to counseling. Keep it as clean as possible though, you don't want your kids to see you guys being hurtful towards one another. I wish you the best.

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Kolan Kiara=]
move out
take your money
take the kids
take your stuff

leave her to be alone

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Go directly to a lawyer. Do not pass go, do not collect $200.

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mother of 2 little women
Sorry to say sweetheart but yes she is right now you are a sitter, maid and a walking atm. If she is not committed to the marriage then why should you be. I am sure there is a women that would love to have a man that is committed. Make sure you keep the kids out of the mess but you have to get rid of her.

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¢нєєку кιттєи™ [мaмa мode:on]
Sounds like she has some serious issues with you. Like everything she is doing she is doing to hurt you and see what you reaction is like. I think she just wants to know how much you care for her and how much you will fight for her. If you are saying you will leave/divorce/ etc then it's telling her that you dont care much. By her telling you to stay till u find somewhere she is speaking indirectly to you. She wants you to stay but something needs to change somewhere. What are her main insecurities? That she thinks you dont trust her? Did u ask where she was till 430am? I dont know it sounds very complicated and maybe you both need to sit and work out where things are going wrong. all the best.

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She is using you, Well she is out running around and your a falling for it all. Tell her to leave since she seems to have a problem with be home and being a wife.You have every right to the house and kids as she does.Dont let her play you for a fool. Good Luck

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its time to get out of that unhealthy relationship, she is not treating you the way you deserve, you sound like a great guy, you will find someone great, who treats you the way you deserve.

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missy p
a ya dude you are being used big time kick her azz to the curb get you a good woman

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and why the heck are you questioning when the answer is obvious?????

How about you kick your adultress wife out of the house, file for divorce and get custody.

Obvious reasons

*Meeting online.
*wants a divorce
*Does not want to be commit in relationship/marriage.
*Can not raise children at the same time partying like a 21 year old.

List goes on.

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I say get a divorce, lawyer, and move out. Cut her out of your life. Quit giving her money. But if you are smart listen to your heart and not the people of yahoo answers

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Cleo (in disguise)
You're being used.

Definitely move out before next weekend.

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you already know the answer to your question...you said it yourself...you are tired of the lies...move out...do not let her talk you into anything..just pack and move...move on with your life

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go to court for your house and kids

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my advice:
you sound miserable.
take the kids with you she doesn't deserve them.

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First of all, sorry to hear you're going through this.

In answer to your question, yes, she's using you. The rest of this is not going to be nice because you need the unpolished, unvarnished truth, and a jolt to wake you up out of this comatose, sleep-walking nightmare you're trying to hold together as a marriage. She has not been nice to you for a long time...you don't owe her anything at this point.

And why should you be the one moving?
While every story has two sides, I suspect you are just not the bad guy in all this.

If she's been doing this for six years, you've allowed her to stomp on you for five years too long.

I would allow the first year after it started to attempt counseling, reconciliation, etc. due to having kids involved. But, the rest of the time...sigh...I guess we can assume you were simply hoping this was a phase that would come to an end and clearly has not.

You need to kick her lying, cheating, manipulative, disrespectful rear end out of your home, and let her fend for herself.
Why should your kids be deprived of the parent who is actually parenting, and left in the hands of someone who uses her free time to ho around with internet guys and go out on dates with people other than her husband instead of spending time on her family?

Get your head out of your rear, stop being a mouse, and stand up and be a man.

Grow some kahunas guy...you, and your kids deserve better.
Being supportive is fine. Being a doormat is not.
Stop letting her wipe her feet on you as she enters and exits.

Go get a lawyer, and set things in motion to keep your house, keep your kids, and let hoochie mama pay child support Be smart about it, because based on everything you've said, she's a user, and she will take you for everything she can given the chance.

Show your children how to make tough decisions and better choices. Set the example they will need to be able to have healthy relationships in their lives. Do you really want them seeing her behavior as an acceptable way to treat someone you love? You guys are the only example they have, you know.

Best of luck to you.

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